Happy New Year!

I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas and enjoyed some relaxation time with family and friends. I spent the break in South Carolina--highlights included catching up with a couple of old friends, eating a wider variety of foods than my normal soup and oatmeal (Mom made mashed potatoes, corn souffle, and beef stew--plus I discovered that I can eat Christmas cookies if I break them up into crumbs and put each piece on my tongue until it's mushy and able to be swallowed!--in Florence I had mac and cheese, broccoli casserole, sweet potato casserole, and even the top of a piece of pizza--cheese and pepperoni cut into little bits and swallowed!), Christmas Eve services back in the sanctuary of my Charleston church after over a year away due to termite damage and repairs, spending time with my nephews and meeting their brand new puppy, and seeing so many family members in Florence at my grandmother's house. It was so nice to have a break from the daily work routine (even though I just had a two week break for surgery!) and spend some down time reading, relaxing, and catching up with friends and family.

I was back in Atlanta briefly after my SC trip and made it to the oral surgeon for another follow-up appointment. He said everything is still looking good, took some stitches out, and gave me permission to stop wearing the rubber bands (although was very clear that that does not give me free license to have a hamburger). I go back in another two weeks and hope to get permission to eat more food and eventually to start running and going to step class again--I miss it! I'm still on the "no chew" eating restrictions, but I'm surprising myself at how I've been able to follow that while still trying to have some variety in my diet. Pasta is easy to do if you can cut it in small enough pieces; last night I had corn and spinach enchiladas, rice, and black beans at a Mexican restaurant--it's great to actually have a legitimate meal and feel full! I think those 10 pounds I've dropped over the last 4 weeks are slowly creeping back...

I'm now in the northern VA/Washington DC area for a few days to spend the New Years holiday with some of my favorite people. I've already been able to catch up with several of my best UVA friends, a friend from ATL who now lives here, and I'm looking forward to a low-key New Years Eve celebration with my favorite girls tonight. It's crazy how I am now craving a low-key, calm celebration as opposed to the bars and parties we've done over the past few years--guess that's a sign that I'm starting to become an old lady! Although not too old--it certainly hasn't escaped me that beer and wine are both allowed on the liquid diet (in moderate quantities of course!). :)

Best wishes for a great start to 2010 for everyone. I'm looking forward to 2010 for several reasons--first off, fingers crossed that this adventure through orthodontia, jaw surgery, and all my other teeth/mouth issues will finally be over. I better have the best smile on the block by this time next year! Also, 2010 will hopefully be the year that I make a change and head off to grad school...new location, new lifestyle, new friends. Scary but exciting! Good luck to all of you on your resolutions...mine include spending more time reading instead of TV watching, cooking more for myself, starting up a daily push-up routine to get back some of the upper arm strength I've lost since surgery and since the triathlon training ended, and, on a less specific level, being more open-minded about taking risks! Happy New Year!

Back to the grind

I have almost made it through my first week back at work (and last full work week of 2009!), and it already feels like my surgery was much longer than only about 2 and a half weeks ago. As I get back to my normal routine...and as my life gets less interesting, I will probably only post on the blog when something new happens that relates to the surgery and recovery. Although I have enjoyed blogging way more than I thought I would...so maybe I will subject anyone who is still reading this to the more mundane details of my life over the next few months! :)

Highlights of the week...
Monday - I got another excellent report from my oral surgeon at my weekly check-up, and he gave me clearance to use a straw, to do low-impact exercise (sadly no step class allowed yet), and to get my hooks off! He predicts when I come back the Monday after Christmas he'll also let me stop wearing the rubber bands. And he told me that I can't do any damage by talking too much, so that's a relief! The ladies that work in his office couldn't believe how much better I was looking!

Tuesday - I got the first appointment I could at the orthodontist and got the hooks taken off my braces...amazing. No longer have those stupid things jabbing into my lips.

Wednesday - I was actually able to stuff myself at our annual holiday potluck lunch at the office. Corn souffle, mac and cheese, sweet potato casserole, deviled eggs, pumpkin pie--just so happens that those are all things I can take little bites of, mush around in my mouth, and swallow! My stomach wasn't used to being so full after two weeks of soup. The lunch also inspired my first trip back to the gym...my walk on the treadmill that night was prep for the Virginia Highlands Holiday 5K tomorrow morning (thanks to Kim K. and to Lindsey for agreeing to walk with me!).

Thursday - I finally experienced the amazing-ness that is the peppermint chocolate chip milkshake at Chick Fil A. If you haven't had one of these, you should--and hurry, since they're only around at Christmastime. SO DELICIOUS.

I'm looking forward to a weekend of productivity (gotta finish those applications!) and Christmas-y traditions (going to the Nutcracker on Sunday!) and then heading to Charleston on Monday!

Tis the season!

Yesterday was by far the most social, fun-packed day I've had since before surgery...and by the time I got home around 2:30AM, my jaw muscles felt similar to the way my leg muscles did after I ran the half marathon! The doctor never said anything about talking restrictions, so I'm thinking I should be OK--but I definitely gave my jaw a work-out. It was worth it though--so fun to see so many friends, dress up in holiday attire, and catch up on what I've missed in the last two weeks. Everyone was so complimentary on how my face is looking, so even though I can still notice the swelling, I'm feeling fine about going back to work and to my normal daily routine.

I spent the afternoon doing the Virginia Highlands Holiday Home Tour (that's my neighborhood) with a couple of friends. Each stop on the tour always has food from neighborhood restaurants, and two of them had soup this year, which made me happy! Then I started out the evening at the Bain holiday party. I always look forward to the party, and this year's was a lot of fun as usual. It was a little strange to see everyone since I feel so removed from the office even after only being out for two weeks (and also a little strange to be sipping on a Diet Coke all night instead of wine!), but I'm really glad I was able to go. I even got to enjoy a few treats--the buffet had mashed sweet potatoes (I had a small plate-full!) and there was a hot chocolate bar after dinner...complete with marshmallows, different varieties of whipped cream, peppermint sticks, chocolate shavings, etc. Amazing! After the Bain party, I made a stop at Sarah and Andrea's Christmas party and got to catch up with a lot of my favorite ATL friends.

I was surprised that I wasn't in more pain when I got home after all that talking. My jaw just felt a little sore, but I was more bothered by the hooks on my braces--they poke and jab in my lips when I talk a lot. I'll be glad to get those off soon. Back to the oral surgeon tomorrow for another check in--I'm hoping I get the OK to get back to some low impact exercise and get an overall good report on how things are looking!

Here are a few pictures from last night...

This one is me and my friend Catherine at the Bain party (special thanks to Krisanne for picking a bridesmaid's dress that I've been able to wear so many times!):

Here's a dance floor action shot of me and Lindsey that features a side profile view:

And here's one of me and Andrea at party #2 (sadly I do not own a tacky Christmas sweater so I just had to go with festive green):

Final days of the out-of-work recovery period

Sorry I haven't updated in a few days...but there really hasn't been much to say, which I guess is a good thing!! I've been managing everything just fine without my mom here (although I definitely miss her cleaning and dish-washing skills--and her company too, of course!), and I've actually been very productive. It's amazing how much you can get accomplished when you're not going in to work!

Since I got most of the TV watching out of my system last week, I've successfully been able to focus on grad school applications. After this afternoon, I'll only have one school left to tackle...but I still have some time this weekend, next week, and next weekend to meet my goal of finishing everything before Christmas. I have found that I have spurts of productivity in the morning and then in the afternoon, with breaks in between for errands or rest. This week I've had visits from the plumber and the gas company (and my friend Kim!), gotten my car serviced, my hair cut, shopped for groceries, etc.--I like the excuses to get out of the apartment and get some fresh air.

As far as how I'm feeling, I'm still able to manage the pain with the medication I'm currently on (which luckily doesn't make me crazy). I don't like that I'm still somewhat dependent on them (I can definitely tell when my 6 hours is up and it's time to take another one), but I keep reminding myself that it's only been less than 2 weeks since the surgery. The weird numb/tingly feeling seems to be getting a bit better, but I also think I may just be getting more used to it. While it doesn't hurt at all to talk for short periods at a time, I can tell when I've overdone it. I'm planning to go to both the Bain holiday party tomorrow and another Christmas party, and I think I'll be hurting when I get home after all that talking. As far as swelling, I can still notice it, but I don't think it's noticeable to anyone that doesn't know I had the surgery, which is a relief.

A couple of other observations...

• I already really miss eating regular food. Don't get me wrong, I love butternut squash soup (and I like a lot of other kinds), and I'm still enjoying the milkshakes. But I've been struck by cravings when I've been out running errands these past few days...today I passed Subway and was dying for a 6 inch turkey on wheat with salt and vinegar chips. Yesterday I drove past Wendy's and really wanted a cheeseburger and fries. At Trader Joe's I saw these amazing looking dark chocolate Oreo-like cookies covered in peppermint that were screaming to me. I haven't completely ignored the cravings--I still went to Wendy's and got a Frosty, and I bought the cookies...and used one in a milkshake last night! Not sure how to deal with the Subway craving though...plus I know I'm going to smell all sorts of amazing things at my upcoming holiday events and be very sad I can't enjoy them. At least it means no extra holiday pounds...even with a milkshake every day, I'm still down about 7-8 pounds at this point.
• The hooks and rubber bands make my braces much more noticeable. Just today I got comments on them from the guy at my hair place (he asked how long I had had them and was curious to know more since he's thinking about getting them) and from the lady fixing my drink at Starbucks (she told me she still remembered how annoying her braces and rubber bands were and gave me a "I feel sorry for you" look). If it had been like this when I first got my braces, I would have been a self-conscious mess. I don't even really care at this point, especially since I know the hooks will be coming off in another few weeks, since I can reply with "yeah, I just had jaw surgery so these rubber bands are a necessary evil", and since I'm still thankful I don't have my jaw wired shut. But the next time you see an adult with braces and start to comment on them, take a second to think about the comment...I'm not saying that you shouldn't mention them, but make sure it's a productive comment! :)

I'll try to get some pictures at the holiday festivities tomorrow night and post them on Sunday!

On the mend

I am happy to report that I am definitely feeling better with each passing day. I'm still on pain medication, but it's the kind that doesn't make me crazy (thank goodness), and I still look pretty swollen (although everyone who has seen me swears it's not as bad as I think it is). The worst part? You know that feeling you get when your foot falls asleep and then you move and it's all numb and tingly for a few minutes? Imagine that--on the bottom half of your face--ALL the time. It's not painful, just very strange and somewhat uncomfortable. I went to the doctor again today, and he told me it's totally normal (and actually a good thing). Not only is my swelling still putting pressure on the main nerve of that area, but my muscles and everything else in my jaw/face are getting used to the new placement of my jaw and my new bite. He said it will probably last a few more weeks, so I guess I'll just have to keep getting used to it. He told me again that everything looks great, and he took out the stitches on each side of my face where the tiny screws are. He said that both he and I will notice some swelling for the next 8 weeks, but that most people won't really be able to tell after another week or so (for those of you that see me on a regular basis, you'll have to be honest with me when I ask if you can notice!). I go back in a week for another check-in, and then I'll probably go back once every couple of weeks until he releases me back to my orthodontist for the end of my treatment...and fingers crossed, in about 3-4 months, the braces will be off. I CAN'T WAIT.

My mom heads back to Charleston tomorrow morning, and I'm confident that I'll be just fine getting along the rest of the week without her. Don't get me wrong--I could never have gotten through the past 8 days if she hadn't been here. But I'm feeling better now, and she has given me lessons on how to make everything in the Magic Bullet. The hardest thing without her at this point will be keeping track of when to take all my medicine--she keeps meticulous notes on what time I take everything so that she knows when to give me the next set--I never have to lift a finger! I think I can handle it though, and I have some great offers from friends to come by and say hello (warning--it is still a little painful to talk for more than 20-30 minutes at a time, so visitors, don't be offended if I am not keeping up my end of the conversation or if I politely try to kick you out after a little while!).

In addition to watching the entire final season of Gilmore Girls over the past 3 days, we have gotten out of the apartment a few times. Yesterday we did go see New Moon (still good the second time for me, and yes, I realize I am a nerd) and then stopped by the grocery store, and today we went to the doctor and to get pedicures. :) I think I mostly have the all-day TV watching out of my system at this point...which will hopefully force me to productively use these next few days to work hard on finishing my grad school applications!! Other than getting my car serviced and getting a hair cut, I don't have any other plans, but if I post it on here, maybe it will keep me accountable. Although I did receive a basket full of fun distractions yesterday that I may let myself get tempted by--thanks Mary Pat and Patrick!

Hope everyone is having a great week--special congrats to my best friend Linds for finishing her first semester of grad school today--xoxo!

Cabin fever

It's weird to think that it's almost been a week since mom and I made our way to ATL after Thanksgiving. The last few days have gone by in such a blur that I can't even really keep track of time! I had my follow up appointment yesterday with my oral surgeon, and after looking at an x-ray and at me, he said he thinks everything looks perfect. Hard for me to believe with such a swollen face and yucky mouth (side effects of having "oral trauma" are really chapped lips and cuts on the inside of your mouth).

One good thing that came out of the appointment was that he said I could go off of the really heavy pain meds and switch to a prescription Motrin, which I immediately did. I can definitely tell a difference in how alert I am--today was the first day where I stayed awake all day and didn't fall in and out of sleep. One not-so-good thing was that he told me to strictly stick to foods I could drink and not even use a spoon. Luckily Mom has been successfully experimenting with the Magic Bullet and I've had some delicious smoothies, soups, and milkshakes (including one with Nutella, yum!). I haven't really had the energy to be very active, so I have been watching a LOT of TV...I recorded the entire season of Project Runway on my DVR, and we finished that today. I also forced my mom to watch Twilight last night, and I think we're going to venture out tomorrow to go see New Moon. :) We both definitely need to get out of this tiny apartment (although she thoroughly cleaned my bathroom today, so I am not complaining too much about keeping her stuck indoors)! I've now switched to Gilmore Girls DVD's, which luckily can keep me occupied for hours.

I wouldn't say that I'm in a lot of pain, just still feeling weird and uncomfortable. I think the nerve endings are beginning to wake up (which I know is a good thing) but just leaves me with a tingly, not quite numb feeling all over my face. And I still just feel disgusting every time I look in the mirror. The doctor says I'm past the point of my worst swelling and that it should get better from here, so I've got my fingers crossed that he's right! I'm going back to see him on Monday before my mom leaves on Tuesday, and I'm hoping I'll get more positive news at that point.

I know I keep saying it, but thank you to everyone -- for the beautiful flowers, sweet cards, and many e-mails/text messages. Sorry I haven't really felt like talking to anyone, but it still feels weird to do too much talking right now. Just know that I love you all!

In a valley

Sorry it has taken a while to post something new...I really haven't had the energy to get out the bed and do anything these past 2 days. I know they say that you have to go through valleys in order to get to peaks--and these past 48 hours or so have definitely been a valley. I was feeling OK in the hospital and for a few hours after coming home (when I wrote my last, more optimistic post), but I have been feeling pretty horrible since then. I think most of it can be blamed on the pain meds--they make me very groggy and disoriented, and for a while I would keep waking up and wondering what day it was. It also definitely hurts to open my mouth any wider than getting a sip of liquid in, so I haven't even really been able to use a spoon for anything. And it's not just my jaw that is hurting--my whole body aches for some reason. I have been watching a lot of TV but couldn't really tell you what I've seen since I keep dozing off during things!

My swelling hasn't gotten any better--I have compared how I look to one of Eddie Murphy's characters in the Nutty Professor --big puffy cheeks and chin. It also feels like the entire inside of my mouth has dried out. But one good sign is that I'm losing my numbness, so here's to hoping there's no permanent nerve damage or anything (which is one of the risks of the surgery).

Thanks again so much to all of you for your encouraging words. It definitely helps to know that there are people out there rooting for me to get better! I have my first follow-up appointment with my oral surgeon in a few hours, so I will post again after that.

I'm alive!

Besides being a little out of it at the moment (I didn't believe my mom when she said it was evening not morning), I'm feeling much better than I thought I would be at this point! We got to the hospital right on time yesterday, and I was one of the first ones called back to prep for surgery. My surgery was scheduled for 7:30AM, so they started on me bright and early. All I know is that it took ~2 hours and that my doctor thinks it was successful. One of my biggest fears was the possibility of having my jaw wired shut, and that didn't happen, so YAY!

I spent the rest of yesterday and last night in my hospital room. I wasn't sleeping as much as I thought I would, but that could be because of nurses coming in and out. My vitals stayed normal throughout the night, and my doctor came in again to say that he thought it went well. I was surprisingly alert yesterday...which I can thank the magical morphine for--and only had some trouble when I tried to talk too much and when I tried to drink water (imagine trying to drink out of a cup when you have numb lips!). My face is pretty swollen right now (I look like a chipmunk), and that's supposed to get worse before it gets better). I also just found the whole hospital experience pretty uncomfortable.

I got back home this morning around 10AM and have been mostly sleeping since then. The pain still isn't bad at all, but I wonder if I am just drugging myself up so that I don't feel nausea. Oh well, I hate throwing up, and I don't think it would be too pleasant on my jaws. so I'll take all the anti-nausea pills they can give me. So far I've eaten pudding, grits, and applesauce. :)

Thanks again for all the well-wishes and encouragement!

The obligatory "before" pictures

I have to be at the hospital in about 6 and a half hours, and I am way too keyed up with nervous energy to try and go to sleep (plus, I'll basically be sleeping for the next 24-48 hours anyway, so I may just keep it going and catch up on Gossip Girl before even attempting to fall asleep!). Luckily my mom and I had a busy day in ATL today, which distracted me a little from thinking about tomorrow. We made it back last night and first on the agenda was decorating my Christmas tree. It just brightens my small apartment up so much, and I know it will make me happy to have the lights twinkling next to me when I'm on my couch for the rest of the week. Mom took a couple of pictures of me in front of it this morning so we could have the "before" shots...

Included on today's to-do list were an orthodontist appointment where they put on my "surgical hooks"--not extremely flattering but not nearly as noticeable or uncomfortable as I expected (theybasically are just little hooks attached to my brackets so that the surgeon can use rubber bands tomorrow and so that I can attach rubber bands if necessary afterwards). Then we made a grocery store run to stock up on soup, yogurt, juices, ice cream, frozen fruit for smoothies, etc. As my items started going down the conveyor belt, I challenged my cashier to see if she could figure out the theme...I had to help her out, but she was very sympathetic!

I also picked up all of my various prescriptions for when I come home--pills for the pain, pills to try to not make me nauseous from the pills for the pain, antibiotics to *hopefully* reduce the swelling, an antiseptic mouth rinse to prevent infection, and a nausea patch that I'm getting ready to put on before bed. I've had bad reactions to pain medication in the past that have made me sick, and I do NOT want to be throwing up with new screws in my jaw, so we're taking all possible precautions!

I ended my night by going to my favorite step aerobics class one more time in 2009 (no high- impact exercise for a month) and having one last regular dinner of a turkey sandwich with hummus, potato chips, and pretzels...and I'm having my last treat before my midnight cut-off as I type this--an amazingly delicious Potbelly sugar cookie that Linds shipped me all the way from Chicago (xoxoxo!).

I won't be posting anything from the hospital tomorrow (I don't think it would be coherent even if I tried), but I'll try to put together at least a short update when I get home on Wednesday. Thank you all so much for all of your encouraging e-mails and phone calls, I have been feeling very loved these past couple of days! :)

Black Friday to prep for Black & Blue Tuesday

My goal yesterday was to eat a big enough Thanksgiving meal that would make me feel ill afterwards...mission accomplished. I stuffed myself with turkey, dressing, veggies, rice & gravy, and pie at lunch yet somehow still had room for a turkey sandwich and more pie for dinner. I just keep telling myself I'll be glad I did that when I'm not able to eat such big meals over the next few weeks! I also told myself I'd be glad I got up early to run the Charleston Turkey Trot 5K yesterday morning since I won't be able to run for a month or so. I never feel amazing on early morning runs, but I finished in under 30 minutes, which is always my 5K goal!

Today Mom and I hit the stores to take advantage of some major Black Friday deals--not at 4AM or anything crazy like that, but still early enough to get some "early bird" specials (which luckily just requires getting there before 1PM). I ended up buying a couple of things at Bed, Bath, and Beyond in preparation for surgery recovery...

1) A Magic Bullet - yes, from the infomercials...this machine supposedly chops, blends, purees, etc. with the touch of a button, plus it allows you to prepare and then eat from the same container (and even microwave or refrigerate if necessary)...a definite pro for someone like me who doesn't have a dishwasher. I think it will be great for smoothies, milkshakes, and soups.

2) A cotton candy pink Snuggie - let's face it, I'm cold all the time, and I think the Snuggie is the perfect item for me to own. Now I just have the "but I'm recovering from surgery!" excuse to justify the purchase.

T minus one week

One week from now I will be spending my one night post-surgery in the hospital. It's so weird to think that the surgery itself will be over but the recovery process will have just begun. I've definitely started to freak myself out by reading other blogs written by folks who have had similar surgeries...I thought it would make me feel better to see that they made it through, but it's making me more scared about the swelling, the pain, the potential numbness that could last a while (no one is allowed to laugh at me if I develop a drooling habit over the next few months), etc. I'm also starting to get nervous about what my post-surgery profile is going to look like. I've never really thought there was anything wrong with my profile (the surgery is necessary to correct my bite, not for cosmetic reasons), and I'm worried I'm going to be unhappy with the results. Guess there's absolutely nothing I can do about it at this point...

I had my final pre-op appointment with my oral surgeon yesterday, and he explained the procedure one more time and answered more of my questions. For those of you who care about the medical side of things, the fancy terminology is that I'm undergoing mandibular advancement by means of a BSSO, or a bilateral sagittal split osteotomy. For those of you like me who are confused by that, it basically means they are moving my lower jaw forward then fixing it in its new position with tiny screws (which I'm told will not set off airport security). If all goes well during the surgery, it won't be necessary to wire my jaw shut after surgery...so fingers crossed that all goes well!

As far as timeline, Mom and I report to the hospital (Emory University Midtown Hospital for those that care) at 5:30AM next Tuesday, December 1. They'll knock me out then perform the surgery, then I'll be able to go home on Wednesday. I'll be out of commission for about a week (heavy painkillers, scary-looking swelling, etc.) and then will be taking it easy for another week. After surgery, I'll be on a "liquid diet" until further notice...so basically it's just fluids and anyting that is a mushy consistency that I can spoon in my mouth. Time to pull out the blender...

I'm headed to Charleston tomorrow for Thanksgiving and am planning to have a 100% guilt-free big meal (plus dessert) since it will be my last one to enjoy for a while. I've also been snacking on pretzels, potato chips, pita chips, apples, tortilla chips, you get the picture. I'm going to miss those!

Joining the blog world

I'm finally doing it--joining the crowd and starting up a blog. I used to think my life was way too boring for a blog...seriously, who the heck wants to read about my daily routine of going to work, maybe hitting up my favorite step class at the gym, and then sitting on my couch in front of my TV (yes, that is basically what most days consist of in my life)? Unlike my friends, who were blogging about adventures like teaching English in China or traveling around Asia and the Middle East or who had amazing insights and theories on life's big and small moments, I didn't really think I had anything important to say.

With my jaw surgery right around the corner (seriously, how is December 1 almost here already???), I decided that now is the time. Instead of sending out mass e-mails to friends and family about my progress, I think a blog is more efficient. Plus, maybe it will distract me from the impending doom of a likely-to-be-painful recovery and at least six to eight weeks of a "no-chew" diet. I'm willing to give anything a shot.

So here goes nothing. I'll try not to gross anyone out with the gory details (and I refuse to post photos of myself directly after surgery like I've seen on some other blogs...only my mom should have to witness that)--instead I'll focus on providing updates on how I'm doing and sharing anecdotes about a life that temporarily revolves around smoothies, soup, oatmeal, pudding, etc. etc. etc...